Lean On Me
by marissajc
Summary: A current case has Beckett dealing with her emotions.


Dr Lanie Parish just finished her shift at the ME's office and decided to grab dinner with her best friend Detective Kate Beckett. It has been quite an emotional day. The case they have been working on was definitely taking a toll on the Detective. Her partners Detective Esposito & Ryan knew they had to help their boss but just didn't know how.

The case in question involved a little girl losing her mother. Being a ME, it was she job to find out what happened and the caused. To rule it a homicide, Lanie knew what this case was going to do to Beckett. The hardest part was telling Beckett what she found. As much as Kate tried to hide the tears, there was just one which escaped down, she quickly excused herself and ran out of the room.

"I think I should go after her", said Castle.

"No Castle, don't think that is a good idea. She needs to let it out and deal with her emotions", Lanie replied.

"Come on Lanie. You can't be serious. She is going to spiral down. You saw the look on her face. She is barely hanging on", replied Castle.

"You think I don't know that Castle. For your information, I know Kate longer than you and I know what she is feeling right now. Hovering around her and hoping she is going to open up will only shut her down further. She needs the space to work all this out. She will open up when ready. I know you mean well but trust me on this", Lanie said gently hoping that Castle will understand.

The frustration look on Rick's face made Lanie knew that all he wanted to do was hold her best friend and comfort. Working homicide the type of cases that the team is assigned, these are the cases which are bound to pass thru. Whether Beckett can handle it, only time will tell.

Looking at the door, Castle answered "I hope you are right Lanie".

Outside on the hallway, Detective Kate Beckett just ran as fast as she could. Pushing the exit stairs doors, she just froze. She couldn't breathe. There wasn't enough air not going thru her lungs. Feeling light headed, she stood against the wall beyond the door out from prying eyes, sat the floor closing her eyes. She was hurting on the inside, only the sound of whisper cries could be heard echoing thru the stairways. The pain will not go away, her shoulders feels like a ton of bricks have been added on, her legs have turn to jello, she just wants it all to end.

On the other side of the wall, Castle just stood outside. He was so tempted to push those door & give Beckett a hug. He has never felt so helpless in his life. Even when he was a single father, he always know that even though the journey will not be easy but as long as he has Alexis, everything was going to be all right. He was willing to work hard and give the Alexis the life he never had. Thinking back to his younger day, Martha too had to sacrifice a lot. Life has seriously not been easy for the Rogers family. But they battled it head on & won at the end. He wishes to give Beckett the support that she needs. After waiting for a few minutes, there was no sign off of Beckett walking thru the door, Castle left back to the loft.

Close to midnight, Beckett open the loft doors. The loft was dark, the only light shining thru the living room was light from the street. No keyboard clicking sounds. Walking towards the master bedroom, she changed her clothes wearing only baggy pants and a sweet shirt. Poured herself a glass of water and sat by the window just staring out at the stars.

Suddenly she felt a hand on her shoulders. Slowly she turned and found herself staring into Castle face. The next reaction just came naturally to her. Tighten her arms around his neck, Beckett hugged Castle as tight as she could. Tears started to escape her eyes and that is when Castle knew that she has lost the battle of trying to be strong. Wrapping his arms around her waist, Castle just whispered comforting words into her eyes hoping that it was some help her find the peace she was looking for. What seems like hours was actually minutes.

"I miss my mother. The whole day I couldn't do anything but think what the child was going thru, what I went thru", Beckett whispers to Castle. Not wanting to break the moment, Castle just nod urging her to continue.

"I want to be able to bring closure. Find out who was responsible. This is the reason why I choose to become a cop. A homicide cop. But the moment I landed on a case which reminds me of my past, I breakdown and completely lost focus", Beckett continued. Frustration was what she felt.

"Is this going to happen to me every time there is a case which hits close to home?".

Rubbing her back, Castle answered "Don't doubt yourself. Sure the case threw you off but it is perfectly normal. I would be worried if you weren't affected by the case. There is nothing Katherine Beckett won't be able to do once she sets her mind to it. You are the best homicide detective with the highest closure rate cases. It also doesn't help that the detective is hot, sexy and has those wonderful long legs which can … ", laughed Castle when he saw the famous eye roll from his girlfriend.

"If that is your way in boosting my confidence Castle, I think you can do better. But if your goal was to make me smile just a little, you succeeded. Thanks for listening and giving me the space when I needed it". Beckett smiled just a little.

"Don't think I was not tempted to follow you thru those exit door after you ran off but Lanie was the one who stopped me and told me to give you the space. So all I did was walk up to the doors and lean on the wall waiting for you but you didn't so I left". Castle said softly.

"Oh Castle, my sweet Castle. I … ", Beckett whispered into his ears.

"No Kate, you don't have to explain. We, Espo and Ryan are going to find out what happened and who is responsible for this. You are not alone".

"But what happens if I can't bring closure to the little girl. What happens …. ", tears started to roll down.

"Kate listen to me. I know that you are not the type who would give up easily. You will turn all stones, knock on all door and scare those who need to be scared just to find out the truth. Just treat the case like any other case you have worked on. You and I will work on the emotions together. You won't be alone", Castle says.

"What did I do to deserve you Castle? When my walls was up, you broke it down with your patience, understand and love. The strength in you just amazes me. Thank you", Kate touches Rick's cheek and give him a soft peck.

"As the strength in you also amazes me Kate. You made me a better person. I don't know why our world collided but I'm happy that it did.

Looking into the dark night, Kate leans her head on Rick's shoulders. Putting his arm across her shoulders, Rick lightly kisses her forehead. Sensing that Kate has finally closed her eyes and fallen asleep, Castle whispers softly and gently into the quiet night, "Just lean on me Kate. Lean on me. I will be your strength"..


End file.
